Conquer Anxiety

Anxiety is tricky to understand because it's a mixed emotion of stress, worries and subtle fear that is built over a long time that sometimes we may not be aware of. There are different types, different severity and triggers and thereby we would have to look case individually and find personalise method of support and treatment.

In terms of thought processes, here is some way of thinking that may cause anxiety:

• Worrying about the future


• Being afraid of not knowing (about the future or general expectation in life)


• Being afraid of not having a plan


• Feeling insecure when we not being under control of our circumstance


• Feeling that things must go my way


• Fear of failing


• Being a perfectionist and having unrealistic expectations


• The all or nothing mentality. Feeling you have to have or achieve certain things otherwise you have nothing or it's a waste of life


• Traumatized by past events such as failures or abuse


• Not knowing when to let go and move on if things are counter productive or a waste of time

Having these way of thinking will make you more likely to experience anxiety. If we can change these way of thinking into something more positive and insightful, it would really help you manage your anxiety:

• No point of worrying about the future. If worrying is counter product then don't worry about it. If you are worried then do what you can to make a positive future.


• Have faith and trust in yourself that things will be fine, that you can face whatever challenges comes to you and so you don't have to worry too much for now. Life doesn't equip us with all the tools, so we have to use what we can at that time.  And even if we fall, that's fine, we just stand back up again.


• Perhaps our bad past experience happens for a reason. The important thing is to experience and learn from it. Those who experience more pain and recover from it have grown up a lot. These battle scars are proof of your strength and how you survived and live on to tell your story. You painful past shows how strong, amazing and wiser you are.


• Learn that we can't control external things all the time. What we must focus on is controlling ourselves and our mind. If you can be a master of your mind, if doesn't what the circumstance is, you will be fine.


• Accept that life doesn't always go your way and the way you expect. Accepting doesn't mean you agree with the outcome, it just means you see the situation as it is for now. Of course ,things can always changes in the future too. Seeing the way things gives us clearer vision.


• Failing is fine. Our circumstances shouldn't define who we are. As long as you stand up and continue to walk and try yourself that's all that matters. Look at all the other achievement you've achieved and not just your failures. Count your blessings in health and the fact that you have your family around.


• Don't be a perfectionist. Perfection is only what we may aim for, but be aware that life is imperfect itself and as long as it meets a satisfactory standard that can be more than enough. Give credit for when it is due. Be proud of what you have accomplished if it meets a realistic expectation. And don't forget, perhaps being happy and peaceful inside is more important than have a perfect external condition.


• For those who hurt you in the past, know that it's only the lost and confuse soul that hurt others. Know that you are on your way or are already grown up inside that you can now look at them like a mature person and see that they are the one who is really lost and perhaps they need more help than you. It may be painful at that time, but now you can look at that as an experience that made you better and not bitter. You can only have sympathy for childish lost soul. Compassionate heart and thinking of others well being is what will heal your heart and pain.


• Learn to not be greedy, hasty or impatient. Learn to take things more slowly and easily. The mind that is calmer, slower and more relax are not likely to be agitated and anxious.


• Just learn to let go. Let go of the fear, the wanting to control externally, stubbornness of how things have to be, how things have to be perfect, the past fear, past shame and bitter... From now on, you are free and you can start a new leaf and be a wiser and mature person